Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Matters of the Heart

Have you ever attempted to tackle to answer that question that is almost as important as “what’s my purpose in life?” You probably have. I know I have. I know, quit playing games, it’s time to tell you what the hell I was talking about. Love. What is love? Baby, don’t hurt me. I’ve got a few ideas, coming from some observations that I’ve faced with this full-fledged emotion. From my point, love’s not what it’s all cracked up to be. It’s not the butterflies in the stomach. It’s not blinding. Those are just symptoms (that also could be very misleading). Love’s something totally different. It’s something simple. Not something that came out of Twilight a fairy tale. Love is something that has its up and downs. It can’t be forced upon. Love just happens. And it's definitely not a one-sided thing—that would be infatuation.



Today, I was waiting for the bus and this girl came up to me and she started talking to me. We talked as if we were old friends that bumped to each other and were just catching up. She was nice. She told me that she had recently been dumped by her boyfriend of three years. I asked her how recent. She said, “Feb 23rd.” Today’s, March 2nd. I couldn’t believe it, how could someone handle it so calmly. It didn’t seem like it at all, she seemed so happy and outgoing. I know that three years is a lot of time to spend with one person, but just imagine ten or twenty or better yet, fifty. It just got me thinking, as a couple, you’re always in danger of breaking up. No matter how much you think it impossible, it’s possible. She saw that it was coming, but why wait for the blow when you could just end it when you realize that he’s not the one? She said she “loved him,” but why love someone who doesn’t love you back? To me, that’s not love at all. All these questions rushed into mind as she told me about her situation. I don’t ever want to live in a one-sided relationship where I’m the one trying hard to keep the relationship together. We need to be in a relationship where it’s balanced.


Today, we see so many instances of break-ups or cruel divorces and this is all part of our society. That’s what we all fear. Everyone says that it’s because our lifespan is long and we’re not used to sticking around with one person for forty years. Or that explanation that man is naturally a polygamist. How could we explain those couples who’ve lasted sixty years? Sure those sixty years weren’t perfect as we all think them to be. For all we know, there could have been cases of infidelity or falling out of love during those years. But that’s all a part of it. Obviously, not really the infidelity part, but you know what I’m trying to say. What keeps these couples together is not just love, but faith—in each other. Couples nowadays just think that one small fight is a reason for divorce. We think that it’s the only way out. To be honest with you, that’s the easy way out (depending on the situation). We can say that there’s no such thing as true love or that true love never existed. Call me a hopeless romantic (because I am), but true love does exist. Just savour the moment with that one person. Science says twenty-first century humans have a longer lifespan, take advantage of that. We’ve got lovers from way back when, who could have lasted a century, but lived together for a year or two. Why can’t we just love and not worry about others? Live life like every day was as if you were still pursuing him. I mean, people take this whole marriage thing for granted. It doesn’t matter if you’re married in a church or city hall with a big ass reception or if you’ve signed some document saying that you’re legally married to him. It’s not supposed to be this blitz where we show off how much money our families have. It’s not a competition. What it’s supposed to be is this instance where we take vows to promise to be there for each other through life’s ups and downs “till death do us part” and that this ceremony is to show off how much we love each other and that we don’t care what our guests have to say. What you know for a fact that this person will be your source of happiness for the rest of your life and you will be his too. Sure, I’ve never been married, but this I know is a true story: My parents.


Let me give you some food for thought:
My mom told once that God (or whoever you may believe in) is smart. He built our bodies in a way that would help us make decisions properly, she said:
 God put our brains at the very top of our bodies and the heart below it. It’s a way to tell us never to think with your heart, but with your brain, first. It’s that simple.


Lots of Love,

V


No comments:

Post a Comment