I've Got To Start To Open My Heart

"We were given: Two hands to hold. Two legs to walk. Two eyes to see. Two ears to listen. But why only one heart? Because the other was given to someone else. For us to find."

Ok, so here I am writing blog posts on my friends, and you're probably wondering...What the fuck is going on with V? Or at least I'm hoping you are. So, am I going to answer your question (that I'm hoping that you'd ask)? Is there anything going on with me? Nope. Well, not in a sense. There are little things, but I have been so nervous to ask Harvey out and I'm too much of a pessimist to do so. I really want to, you don't even know...of course, the fear of rejection is an excuse, but it's not a reason. He likes me, I know it. And if you're asking me how, I don't find it necessary to prove it to you. I know, because I just do. The way he treats me, the way he remembers the littlest things from conversations that have long passed, the way he would inch closer every time he stands next to me...And I find that I always have to provide proof of why I like someone or why I know he likes me. I know that these little tid-bits of Harvey might not even be proof, but it's proof to me. I really like him, I  really do. There's no doubt about it. It just sucks, because there's me, talking to him and inside, I'm overwhelmed with emotions. I want him, but I'm stuck in this rut. I want to say something, but I can't.

What's my problem, then? Why don't I ask him out? All girls, like me and you, have that longing to be asked out by a guy. Why? It's probably because of all those chick-flicks that we've been watching. We dream of some hot version of Bradley Cooper walking into our lives and eventually asking us out. And for those who say, "I don't care who asks who out first.", you really do care. Of course, everyone wants a guy to ask us out. It's what boosts our confidence and it's proof that he really is in to us. But hey, the guy might be shy and we can't expect everything to go our way, so there are cases where we have to man up ourselves. So, I don't know, we'll see where Harvey and I go. I'll ask him out, but that, hopefully, won't be the end of our story...and no, I'm not expecting a fairy tale ending...just me and him holding hands, overwhelmed with smiles. I'm not expecting much, but to say that Harvey is mine, is one hell-of-a-victory.

Lots of Love,

V