Friday, July 6, 2012

The Life and Woes of a Single Woman


"Emancipation of women has made them lose their mystery." ~ Grace Kelly
What would women do if there was no such thing as men? Would women's lives without men make it easier than what we go through now? Asking myself these questions, I begin to wonder whether or not living without men is possible. I mean we wouldn't be fighting over them, we wouldn't need to die in the corner just waiting for him to call or text back, or maybe we wouldn't have to worry about getting married or having kids. We could focus on anything that we want, instead of reminding ourselves about what Tim did with this other girl. No, we would just be ourselves. Sounds like a better world, right? 

But ladies, we shouldn't be wishing for a world just full of women. We don't need to get rid of men, because they cause us all this havoc. Sometimes, it's our faults. For the past few weeks, I've been struggling with just about everything. Confusion has become my best friend. Only yesterday was when I saw the truth. I've been talking to a lot of girlfriends recently and all of them are amazing. It's just that sometimes, I find that some of my friendships have been based on guys and how we struggle without them. Being single is a nightmare. And for sure it is, but how can we enjoy our lives when there's someone who's weighing us down...whether or not he/she is actually dating us? We've become consumed with the fact that our life's goal is a Hollywood-founded dream: to get a guy and live with him forever. Our lives revolve around trying to find "The One," when "The One" could be just waiting for something interesting to happen to us. 

When we say that our lives are boring, we actually mean to say: "I'm so alone and no one wants me. Could you help me find someone that I could do everything with?" It just bothers me so much, because what happened to the women in the past rooting for independence and dying for a ballot in the box? What happened to the women who were inspired how other women expressed themselves through words, and not just how they dress? Those women are still out there, but we don't pay attention to those people. They're lives are not interesting enough anymore. I mean people pay more attention to woman who can find fame through sex or through showing her body and not the woman who rose to fame with her intelligence. It's not supposed to be like that, but it is. And to each their own, but I just want to let you ladies know that life is something that we're given. No matter what religion you follow, it's about living life. And how can we do that if it's only based on whether or not this guy asked you out, or what not? It's great, but the thing is...what the hell will you be talking about once you're in a relationship with him? How interesting your life is? Enough said. 

My advice: Live life as interestingly as possible, whether you enjoy riding a bike. Or maybe drawing or even people watching. Life, in all respects, brings you unexpected possibilities when you're not looking. Don't focus on finding someone, focus on yourself first. Trust yourself. Be yourself. Enjoy yourself. A thirty year old friend once said to me, "Once you're thirty and married, you're going to be begging for your singularity back." Freedom is what we wanted and in some parts of the world, that's what we got. Now ladies, embrace being single, once in a while. Because when we don't have it, we're going to want it back. But if we lived a happy life of singledom, we'd be willing enough to live with a significant other. 

Lots of Love,